We have a family wedding in the near future, and I woke up thinking of the happy couple, saying a prayer for a long, blessed marriage. After nearly 20 years, I know a bit of the hard work it takes to make it, and also the immense fulfillment it brings.
If I could give them advice on a long marriage it would be: kindness and forgiveness.
When wronged, hurt or offended in some way, it's common to make that our position. Doing so means the offender must in some way make it right, performing to our personal and exacting specifications. Can I say that people generally aren't that gifted? They can't read your mind (even though they 'should know' what you want), and they probably don't have the personal resources to meet your requirements.
When we bring such a position into relationships, it's exhausting and destructive.
Kindness, though, kindness forgives even though we don't think they deserve it.
Kindness extends warmth and love instead of vengance ("If you won't perform to make this right, then I'll make you pay in my own way").
Kindness heals what is broken. It goes a long, long way towards making a lasting, joyful relationship.
Kindness is mercy.
Anger, hurt, disappointments happen in every relationship. Kindness can bridge over all of that.
My prayer for us all? That we'd both be receivers and givers of kindness.
If I could give them advice on a long marriage it would be: kindness and forgiveness.
Kindness is not giving people what they deserve.
When wronged, hurt or offended in some way, it's common to make that our position. Doing so means the offender must in some way make it right, performing to our personal and exacting specifications. Can I say that people generally aren't that gifted? They can't read your mind (even though they 'should know' what you want), and they probably don't have the personal resources to meet your requirements.
When we bring such a position into relationships, it's exhausting and destructive.
Kindness, though, kindness forgives even though we don't think they deserve it.
Kindness extends warmth and love instead of vengance ("If you won't perform to make this right, then I'll make you pay in my own way").
Kindness heals what is broken. It goes a long, long way towards making a lasting, joyful relationship.
Kindness is mercy.
Anger, hurt, disappointments happen in every relationship. Kindness can bridge over all of that.
My prayer for us all? That we'd both be receivers and givers of kindness.
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