You Can Be That Old Couple In the Park

Last night it hailed on and off, the frozen white pellets bouncing against our house in fits and spurts. You'd think it was over and there would come another wave of the white stuff. This morning, the sun was shining through my windows.

Storms don't last forever, not in nature, and not in marriage.

Marriage is made of so many components: feelings, responsibilities, communication, sex, finances, children, jobs, school, mission, goals, desires, dreams. Each of these is an area where storms can hit, and where the sun can shine again.

With nearly 19 years of marriage there are a couple of enduring truths we've found to finding the sun in our relationship.

• "...consider [your spouse] more significant that yourself". (Phil 2)
• "Look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of [your spouse]." (Phil 2)

We can make a constant choice to love someone more than we love ourselves, to consider them, their wants, desires and feelings, to choose our marriage over ourselves.

Marriage is a union, two people becoming one. Not one dominating the other. Not two individuals. Becoming one, joined together - something altogether new, unique, strangely different, stronger, brilliant and joyful.

• "[love] doesn't demand it's own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of  being wronged....

We lose precious time together when we mull over what's wrong. The other day I was unhappy with something and woke up with it on my mind. As I began to move through my day, I heard the voice that I know to be the Holy Spirit reminding me of how much my husband loved me, highlighting all the ways in which he loves me sacrifically, unselfishly, willingly and purposefully. My "wronged feelings" couldn't withstand the overwhelming evidence that this man chooses me, daily. I simply needed the heart-eyes to see it. Love sees the good, holds on to it, advertises it, dwells on it.

• Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance." (1 Cor. 13)

Don't give up. The sun will come out. There will be times when the storm just seems to keep coming in waves, but the sun will come out. You will be that old couple in the park walking hand in hand, laughing together, and all because you bravely, sacrifically chose to love each other.  You can do it.  I know you can!

Choose love.

Indecision & Procrastination Costs More!

A couple of years ago I joined the iphone phenomena. My phone was given to me with a nice, white hardcase for protection. Over time however, the bottom of the protective cover broke, leaving an exposed, vulnerable spot on the phone. The cover is $20 to replace. No big deal, right? I would go, stand at kiosks and just not be able to choose one, thinking I didn’t want to spend $20 on a cover. Of course the time came when I dropped the phone, on cement, and shattered the face. Through circumstance I had access to a replacement phone. Great! What did I do? I kept the broken case. And yes, I dropped this phone and shattered the case! Now we are talking hundreds of dollars to replace the phone. How stupid! I didn’t want to spend $20 to protect this expensive phone, and now was faced with an expensive replacement. For the record, I now have the most durable, bulky, indestructible case possible.


How often in life do we avoid a small price now, only to pay more later?

• Choosing not to forgive in the small things, resulting in a broken relationship later

• Putting off exercise and then, whoops! the pounds creep on

• Meaning to go to church, but don’t, then finding yourself: in crisis with no support system; no pastor to officiate, yet wanting a church wedding; searching for answers and getting nowhere.

• (insert what you are avoiding doing today)

It’s not worth it!

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today

– Thomas Jefferson

• Take care of your relationships now!

• Take care of your body today!

• Take care of your spiritual life!

• (insert what you will start doing today)

Tomorrow might come, then again it might not. Today is your day!